


Of Falling Stars And Broken Wings

by LiesWeLiveBy



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: ALL THE SPOILERS, Gen, I haven't written fanfic in so long, Just some Reiner angst, does it even make sense, has this been done before?, i haven't written anything in so long, my poor baby, oh gods this sucks, reibert if you want it to be, same with the 104th and marcel, sorry bert's only mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-11 18:23:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15321516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiesWeLiveBy/pseuds/LiesWeLiveBy
Summary: Reiner hadn't realized how hard it would be to put his armband back on.





	Of Falling Stars And Broken Wings

The first time Reiner Braun had ever been free, he was living a lie in the heart of enemy territory.

The first time he'd ever felt worth something, he was pretending to be someone he wasn't.

And the only time he had ever known happiness...he was miles and miles away from home.

_Home._

_Let's all...go home...together,_ the twelve year old boy had cried, as his former self slipped away.

_I swear we're going home,_ he had promised Bertolt at 17, in a rare moment of clarity.

And now, here he was.

Home.

Alone.

Reiner sat in a darkened room. Five long years of guilt, pain, and madness, and he'd finally made it back.

He should feel at peace. Happy. Relieved. Proud to wear the uniform on his back.

And he was...sort of.

Most of it.

Which was why he now sat in the dark, frozen, staring at the piece of cloth on the table in front of him as if it were a venomous snake.

Red background.

White star.

Eldia's symbol. The armband that marked him as surely as if it were branded on his skin.

On Paradis Island, it didn't matter whose blood he carried.

Inside the walls, no one was branded a "devil" just for existing.

In the 104th Cadet Corps...no one needed him to be a hero.

A small, empty part of him still longed for the days in which he wore a different uniform, where instead of a star, he bore the Wings Of Freedom on his back.

Wings...no matter how heavy they were, they had still been-

A sharp knock at the door startled him out of his thoughts.

"War room in five," the cold voice of Porco Galliard came from the other side of it, before his footsteps stomped away down the hall.

Reiner squeezed his eyes shut and forced the treasonous thoughts from his head. He had no business being nostalgic for the enemy.

He was a warrior, vice commander of the warrior unit, the Armor of Marley.

He had his duty.

With difficulty, he pried his fingers free of the clamped fists they had been in the for the past...hour? Longer? He wasn't sure.

He reached for the armband and slid it up his arm without looking at it. Being cloth, it shouldn't have weighed much, but to Reiner, it was as heavy as a shackle.

He sighed, rising from his seat in the corner. The floor creaked and groaned as he made his way over to the door.

Life was life. This was just how things were, and if Reiner knew one thing, it was that whether soldier or warrior, he had no time to endlessly dwell on the past. His father's angry, screaming face flashed through his head, unbidden, then Marcel's guilt-filled one, then Porco and Annie's cold looks. And then another, a tall, soft-eyed boy with a warm expression. A moment of intense, crushing pain filled him, for a moment, before he shook it away with a bitter smile.

No, he never did have time.

He was home.

His mom was proud.

And more than that...he was a hero.

Everything he'd ever wanted.

As he closed the door behind him and set off down the hall, one last haunting thought flickered across his mind.

_Maybe it was better to be a falling star than to have broken wings._

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this idea in my head pretty much ever since the armbands and Eldians were introduced.  
> Reiner's been living without it for 5 years...so putting it back on must have stirred up some feelings, right?
> 
> My first time posting here...please comment.


End file.
